Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Reflecting on 2012 and looking forward to 2013

I was actually going to write this a few days ago, but got busy with end-of-year things, so here it is now. Still the beginning of the year, so it's not too late to join the crowd and reflect on the old and look forward to the new :)
I do not make New Year's resolutions, because I do not have within me the power to effect the changes for which I resolve. Instead, I make effort to receive revelation for the new year (at the risk of sounding mystical or spirtual-er-than-thou ;) ) and set daily resolutions to do God's bidding, whatever the cost.
I make the distinction because rather than focusing on me and what I need or want to do as a person, I focus instead on what God may have for me in the coming 12 months. I find that if I make a resolution to do [task], it is me setting a goal for me, which goal I ultimately fail because I lack resolve. Alternately, if I seek for a revelation of what God has for me, I find infinite motivation in the knowledge that God is working in me to acheive HIS goals for me, and I have peace in knowing that even when I screw up and fail miserably in my daily resolutions He is still working on me and perfecting me. I still have the daily responsibility to focus on Him and the tasks He gives, but the bigger picture is in the hand of the One who is painting it.

Reflecting on 2012.....
At the end of 2011 and into the beginning of 2012, God revealed to me some incredible promises that, from my perspective were absolutely out of reach. However, I felt an indescribable confidence that He would bring it about. So I chose to trust Him and to take some risks that would require a lot of stretching and growing on my part. Of course, as the year wore on I realized that those "risks" were in fact, not truly risks from a spiritual standpoint. Because God had given me a promise, I knew that those steps of faith toward His promise would be sure steps, and the risks would be secure. I admit, a lot of times it felt like I was stepping out onto nothing and would fall on my face. God caught me every time. I learned that you have to be willing to fall on your face if you want God to catch you. He can't catch you if you don't fall on Him.
2012 involved a whole lot of being outside my comfort zone. I had to learn a lot about who I am apart from my family and friends and how to depend on God alone, rather than on people. I've never felt freer from the ties of earth and so ready to do any crazy thing God asks of me. I also discovered what God can do through me when I lay aside my fears and am willing to risk everything to do what I feel He calls. Putting the fear of God above the fear of man is by far the most effective way to get things done!
In the end, the things God had for me in 2012 were far above and beyond the amazing things He revealed at the beginning of the year. If He had shown me everything He had planned, I might have passed out from exhaustion at the thought of it all. He always exceeds my expectations, of course. It made me feel sort of silly for wondering how it would all pan out in the end. But that's what happens when the finite mind tries to comprehend infinite things. Mind. Blown.
Now here I am, looking toward 2013, faced with a lot of the same uncertainties and awe-inspiring promises with which I am faced every new year. But just as in years passed, I feel I have a deeper sense of revelation of God's amazing faithfulness & power than the year before. I am once again caught up in the wonder of the things He is cooking up to serve me this year, and am excited by the knowledge that more than likely He will far exceed these amazing "impossible" things He has been laying on my heart lately. Every mountain I climb, every challenge and hardship I face will be like mere dust to Him who sees the whole picture. I know He will help me through it and in the end I will be amazed once again at what God can do when I yield all control to Him.
2013 is going to be the best year yet!

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